a) You’ve gone to the bother of making the nicest cup of coffee you can, given your circumstances, and you don’t even remember drinking it.
b) Being jittery is your default setting.
c) You can tell your Java from your Colombian.
d) You drain a pot of coffee quicker than a toilet can flush.
e) Your concern for your kidneys is at odds with your serenity.
f) Your response to a customer query is WHAT NOW? CAN’T YOU SEE I’M STRESSED OUT?
g) Going cold turkey fills you with a sense of dread.